It's times like tonight where I wonder why am i just now experiencing life? And while I am reveling in everything, a part of me cannot help but wonder why now? Or even more so, why right now? Why not a few months ago? why not in a few weeks? And then i think about how perfectly timed this all seems to be and I just smile.
I also wish that little voice in my head would shut the hell up and let me just be happy. It is like it cannot have me just be happy. Maybe I can change it's mind, show it that this IS a good thing....until then, sleep. After 'playing' for most of the night, I have to wake up early and try and be productive. (i'm not holding my breahth, unfortunately).
Are you not at peace with your inner self? We all tend to think like detectives sometimes... if a good thing happens, then how, when, why .. these questions pop up.. and if a bad thing happens.. then a lot more questions pop up... that's the nature of humans I think. You just have to control the thinking of your inner self.
ReplyDeleteJust remembered this song from MLTR.. Wild Woman..
And on the heading of this post... Its ok to lose focus sometimes... But don't forget about it.
ReplyDeleteJust when I think I am at peace a tornado decides to roll through my life. Even worse, when something good does happen, if there is any kind of 'free' time I over think everything.
ReplyDeleteI just hope that I can keep my focus...